Anthony says: This is one of my very favorite tracks in part because of how it came to be completed. Nate was going through a very prolific time and was coming up with great ideas before he could finish the previous ones. We'd heard this idea a few times but it's possible we'd never practiced it as a band. He has some lyrics done and the main guitar part. With drums, that was the easiest because Emre can create something quickly even if he's not heard the track before he can create as if he'd be practicing it for weeks. It was a summer evening, if memory serves, and the sun was going down, we'd done several hours of recording and Nate wanted to begin recording this track but with so much of it unwritten I felt we should hash out the other parts (lyrics, bass, guitars, mood) before we even started. Appropriately, there was some restlessness and it was a bit of tooth pulling but we finally knuckled down and together completed the lyrics (which we would revise several times in the course of recording). Nate's guitar (the main / first guitar you hear) and the drums were recorded first. Nate wanted me to play the bass (was almost a custom, if it was my song he played bass, if it was his song I played bass) but for some reason I encouraged him to do so, I guess taking more of a producer role. We piece-mealed the bass into existence, again Nate doing the performing and I helping with ideas, certain lines and timing. When it came time for my guitar, I was able to do it in just a few takes, Nate taking the producer role here. By this time, several hours into the recording I had a great feeling about this song and my involvement with the way it was turning out. The vocals took the longest to get right but were in my opinion the most satisfying in that we again piece-mealed melody lines and phrasing, went back, redid parts that were not quite to our standards, adjusted the lyrics to fit the moment, and did vocal layers and backups. Nate performed all the vocals but we co-wrote them, lyrics and melody lines. He gets most of the credit for this gem but I really enjoyed my involvement and feel my contributions are significant.
lyrics
A short farewell to the days I romanticized my death
Was I too scared to be too strong?
And so much for the masks and melodrama I have worn
That kept me so tired and alone all the time
I complicate myself with who I am and who I think I should be...
(my shadow casts it's doubts and stabs me in the back)
But in my afterlife...all the songs I've ever loved in quadraphonic sound
I dreamt I was a child
And sad Virginia seemed beautiful again
All the pills and highs I've ever felt never could compare to that day
In my afterlife the sun will shine for me and all my friends
I miss you all already...
credits
from 1994 - 1996,
released October 13, 2014
Nate: song, lyrics, guitar, bass, vocals
Ant: guitar, additional lyrics, co-production
Emre: drums, percussion
J. Christian Quick: recording, engineering, co-production
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